Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Istorya sa usa ka Katabang

Usa ka estorya bahin sa usa ka katabang nga si Inday.gihimuan nakog bersyon sa pagtuki aron malingaw tang tanan.

Tungod sa ka kalisod sa kinabuhi sa bukid og sa probinsya si Inday nisulod og nanarbaho sa Siyudad sa Davao og gi-interbyo sa iyang Amo.

Amo: kinahahglan namo og katabang para manlimpyo sa balay, magluto, manlaba. mamalantsa, mamalengke, og magbantay sa mga bata. Kaya ba ni nimo tanan?
Inday: I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of the work that you want, my creativity, productivity and work-efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress.
Amo: [nosebleed]



Nilabay ang pila ka adlaw, niuli ang amo, nakit-an niya nga naay bukol si Junior.
Amo: Nanong naa man bokol si Junior?
Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy's cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.
Amo: [nosebleed napod]

Sa pagkagabii nanihapon sila.
Amo: Nanong parat man ang sud-an?
Inday: The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride (NaCl) affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize.
Amo: [nosebleed napod]

Donya: Nanong inig uli nako maabtan man tika nga sigeg tan-aw og TV?!
Inday: Because I don't want you to see me doing absolutely nothing.
Donya: [nakuyapan]

Pagkaugma, giubanan ni Inday si Junior sa Principal's office, kay dili maka adto ang amo og ang donya.
Principal: Gisumbag ni Junior ang iyang klasmeyt.
Inday: It's absurd! It was never a fact that he will inflict a fight.
I can only imagine how you handle schizophrenic kids on this educational institution. Revise your policies because they suck!
Principal: [nag resign]

Pag-abot sa balay, naa ang amo pirting sukoa.
Amo: Inday! nganong nagkalat man ang basura sa likod sa balay?!
Inday: A change in the weather patterns might have occurred wrecking havoc to the surroundings. The way the debris are scattered indicates that the gust of wind was going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading for.
Amo: [nosebleed napod]

Samtang nagaluto si Inday og panihapon, kiat kaayo si Junior.
Inday: Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property damages and if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be inflicted upon you!
Junior: [nidagan sa CR, giaphiran ang nagdugo nga ilong]
Pagkahuman og luto, nitan-aw og TV si Inday. Nkabalita nga ni hawa si Angel Locsin sa GMA 7.
Junior:Nganong nihawa man si Agel Locsin?
Inday: Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons but because they just know that things will get worse if they'll stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can't understand you for doing so.
Junior: [gisunggo napod]

kadtong gabhiuna, nag text si Inday kay Dodong, ang driver sa silingan, gusto maki pag text-mate.
Inday: To forestall further hopes of acquaintance, my unfathomable statement to the denial of your request - Petition denied.
sa wa madugay, tungod sapakigbisog ni Dodong, nag uyab sila ni Inday. Pero wala nag dugay ang ilang relasyon, og nakipag-break si Inday kay Dodong.
Inday: The statute restricts me to love you but you have the provocations.The way you smile is the proximate cause why I love you. We have some rules to think of. We have no vested rights to love each other because the upper household dismissed my petition!
Dodong: Perhaps you are mistaken, what you seem to contrive as any affections for you are somewhat half-hearted. I was merely attempting to expand my network of interests by involving you in my daily recreation.Heretofor, you can expect an end to any verbal articulation from myself
Naay ni agi nga basurero, og nakisusi sa ilang panag-lalis.
Basurero (nisulti kay Inday): Be careful in letting go of the things you thought are just nothing because maybe someday you'll realize that the one you gave away is the very thing you've been wishing for to stay.

Nadunggan ni tanan sa Amo ni Inday
Amo: [nagpakamatay].
=the end=

17 comments:

Jobs Curator said...

hahaha nalingaw ko sa mga inglis ni inday, scientific kaau ug dating ^_^ pati ang basurero natakdan ug inglis hahaha. Nice post bay! \m/

RoNald said...

Wow. hapit ko gikalintura nagbasa. naabot na man sa petisyon2x.grrrr. murag mga lawyer ah!ahahaha

jacob said...

Oh...i can barely relate to them...

it so awesomeness! ahahaha

yawaang inday oi...inglisira mn diay..

way inglisay kay its very deep i cannot swim..hihi

ice9web said...

the promising words of inday leave me brain drain wahahah (^_^)

galing sa version nimo oi murag naa lang gyud ka makaaway ani bah (^_^) joke ahihihi

Clare Marshall said...

Due to this vast and very illuminating subject of interest, my jaws were locked in place...lol (Inday?..is that u?..:P)
Kahit anu gawin ko...d ko talaga ma reach level ni Inday...nauubusan ako dugo...lol
Atlast, kahit panu...d maxado malalim ang bisaya d2..naintindihan ko halos...hahahah..I'm so happy...nice!
At may astig na advice pa na I think need ko talaga now...heheheeh
Thanks for the post...just my "cup of coffee" for this stressful and sleepy time..hehehe

jigs said...

@lemon - maayo kay nalingaw ka ni inday ric. mao lagi choyest kaayo and basurero.
@ronald - nyhaha grabeh lag si inday kay nag katabang pa nga kuyaw man kaayo og reasoning ability.
@jacob - hehehe mao jud kog grabe ka deep iyang mga english mura man jud og tinood.
@aice - mao lagi busa ato2 na lng ni ha ayaw saba. ahihi
@armcay - your jaws are locked in place- ahaha grabe nga english oi palabwan man si inday. ahaha salamat sa makadaghan

og sa inyo pilia ang inyong katabang

Chai said...

Yati ra!! me pag way katabang. insulto kaayo sa amo jigs!!

me pa sila jigs duh, di basta basta.wahehehe

kakuhaon gud kog dictionary,

Jean said...

sa dhang nose bleed jud..hahay nlng.. bisan ako hapit sad magpakamatay.. hehehe

ipadayon jigs..!!!!

jigs said...

@chai - mao lagi nagpalaban gani kog wordweb kay grabe kaayo og mga terminologies. kung ana akong katabang himoon nalang nakog adviser og speaker.
@jean - mao lagi jean sige na lang tag sungguhon ani. ayaw pagpakamatay oi! wahahaa. salamat

Raqski said...

wow! blogger man d i ka jigs? ikaw na jud na jigs.. oist exchange links ta beh.. e visit nya akong blog ha dyolluel.blogspot.com kay e link tika pud.. thanks

padayon sa pag uswag!

Mae said...

pak, kasosyal na ba krng panahuna uy.. kuyaw naman kau ang mga tao, englispeakining na kau! hahaha.. dili na just-just, aw basta-basta ba!

dumzK said...

hahaha!kakuha gud qg ahat sa hinulman nga dictionary...nahan ka ana!?..c inday spokening dollar kaau..i am not belief of this! hahahaha..aus!

jigs said...

@raqski walay problema i check ra unya puhon naa na daun imong blog sa listahan sa mga kuyaw nga bloggers. heheeh
@freeby.ria dili na jud "just-just" basta2 diay na? ahahaha. lagi mae dili na kumpyanshan.
@domsk ahaha mao sab mar ako palaban sab oi, laliman ka anang ilang english. hehehe. murag mas hawd pa ka ni inday ah.

Admin said...

ahahah.. part na jud sa history sa mga joke ning inday oh! sikat na jud kaayo.. sunod ana wa nay mudawat ana sa iya.. maayong pang mag call center agent xa.. hahaha.. advice lng nako na day ha, basin diay masabtan nimo akong gsulti...hahaha

-mOlit- said...

weeehh.. totyala ni inday, dodong ug sa basorero oi.. d makaya ang powers.. perfect kaayo... maka lisang ang english...hahah...kahilak man sad tag popcorn oi..haha.. padayon sa pag lambo jigs!...=))

jigs said...

@borgee tinood bitaw bay, mas maayo pag mag call center na lng siya. hehehe
@molit ha? popcorn jud. grabe man pod na oi.

lamat sa inyo. :d

Anonymous said...

wahaha lingaw kaayo imong blog..magcige kog hapit dri huh..hehe

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